SHOTS! SHOTS! SHOTS!

     There are the obvious risks of alcohol abuse: liver cirrhosis, drunk driving, and of course, poor decision-making. What we don't talk about are other symptoms. I don't know why. We preach about our food choices and active lifestyle choices, why not go into greater detail about alcohol? I have a money/economy theory, but that's not what I'm talking about today.
     Dementia. It's known that people are prone to poor decisions while intoxicated, but heavy drinking can also lead to deficits in the ability to plan. Although I do crosswords and logic puzzles on the regular, in the long-term my alcoholism will affect my problem solving abilities. It may not be strictly the alcohol, but my drinking can affect the way I absorb nutrients, which can also trigger dementia.
      Surely you've heard the "Which Came First" debate. I always side with the egg, but again, not my topic. Depression and alcoholism go hand in hand. Some people will self-medicate for depression, while others are drunk and get depressed because of it. I'm a case from the latter. I generally lead a good life. Yeah, sometimes I'm broke and sometimes I'm alone. I also have the greatest group of friends for support. I like where I'm living, and I generally like my life. Somehow, I still can't make it a week without consuming a beer or twelve. Just today I've had a carafe of hot sake, a plum wine, three Mike's, and four shots. I'm sure I could come up with a thousand excuses as for why, but the fact remains that I didn't need to drink tonight. I did. I'm not sad, or even lethargic. I went out and did things today. I just wanted to drink.
     I am overweight. I'm not huge, but I'm definitely not the same girl I was ten years ago. You could strike that up as an age thing, but it's where I carry the weight that is a dead giveaway. While I have gotten bigger all around, the majority of the new weight is carried around my stomach. My legs will fit three to four pants sizes down from my waist. My butt is the most awkward thing when buying jeans. I still manage to pick up hotties, so I tell myself it isn't a big deal. It can't be particularly healthy.
     On occasion I develop numbness in my extremities. For about a week last year I couldn't feel the toes on my right foot. I also experienced seizures at the time. Only for the beginning of the week, but still. Seizures are serious business. I absolutely did not go to the doctor. I knew what the cause was, and I knew the solution. Five years ago, a weekend binge resulted in embarrassing stories where I walked into screen doors or spoke of robot conspiracies that would kill my friends. Lately, my binges last a day. I would drink a second day, but between being miserably bedridden and shitting out hurricanes, I just don't have the energy. I used to throw up when I'd had too much, and I miss it. As embarrassing as that was, it was better than admitting that I can't remember anything. I've taken to faking it. I've heard enough blackout stories that I can pretend I know what happened. Back to my statement with the numbness, while I've never shit myself, I've peed. This has something to do with nerve damage. I just don't have the same sensation I used to. It's also ruined drunk sex. Yeah, I can fuck all night, but I will never orgasm. What's the point?
     Yeah, drinking is totally cool. Tell all your friends. I want you to feel superior to everyone you know that uses "hard drugs". Alcoholism is WAY better.