Different than Initially Imagined

Funny thing about memories, they always seem to come by most inconveniently unannounced. Usually they're more than welcome, but sometimes you just have to ask them to leave. Rude things they are, too, with the whole never leaving thing. Even when you have your foot in their ass and you're quite literally kicking them out the door, they still remain quite attached to either sides of the frame. Then again, on the other hand, you have fleeting memories. These ones never stick around or even attempt to make themselves at home. You'll wake up to them in the morning, but if you close your eyes again, even for a second, they're long gone before you've had a chance to make breakfast. While you dream about them, they're often bittersweet dreams. They're also the ones that make you smile when they randomly pop up throughout the day. They're the ones you miss. Even though sometimes they can make you crazy, it's a good crazy.

Maybe I'm just feeling nostalgic today.

Love Hurts

     "The opposite of love is not hate, it's indifference." Elie Wiesel said it the most brilliantly. I usually put it in a more brazen manner, "That asshole won't pay attention to me!" This is usually accompanied by drunken sobs. I'm sure I've gone on about how much break ups suck and also how badly I deal with them. Here we go again.
     Obviously, drinking is not the answer. Drinking leads to calling people at 2 in the morning. I know this mostly stems from my lack of self control. Sometimes that leads to hooking up. Other times, I play drunken confessions and I tell the guy how much I love him, even though he just dumped me. There's where we get the indifference. I just poured out my heart and he just walks away. So then I end up drinking more. Vicious cycle.
     Do not fuck your ex! It's bad enough you just told him you loved him. Casual sex does not turn into love, no matter how often he stays over or tells you how beautiful you look in the mornings. He skips work to fuck. It's nothing more. He knows how you feel, so he knows you won't say no. He's just horny. Look, I know he's a fantastic lay, but there are other fantastic lovers out there. I'm not saying go pick up some strange, but really, have some self respect and quit letting him walk all over you.
     The obsessive behavior has got to stop. You can't plan a future with someone who doesn't care. So, he takes you out to eat and randomly talks to you about his dreams. So what? He dumped you. He doesn't want to be your boyfriend, much less have the white picket fence and grandkids together. Why does he get jealous of your guy friends? Doesn't matter. Quit talking to him and move on. Then again, there was some PDA going on while we were out shopping together the other day. That's totally a sign, right?
     Shit, I think I just entered psychopath territory. I'm pretty sure I said I was bad at this. I don't necessarily need an on-and-off boyfriend, so maybe it's good that he ignores me for days at a time.

Drunk Brains Don't Understand Formatting Rules

I know it's been a minute, and everyone's dying to hear my thoughts. I kinda-sorta got a job and it takes up most of my time. I also work with my ex. Terrible life decisions, I know. Anyways, I may be a little drunk right now, so I figured it'd be a great time to update! Sex is not love. I don't care who you are, it just doesn't happen like that. I keep trying to convince myself otherwise, but when a guy makes you scream it really doesn't mean anything. It really doesn't help that I work with the ex. Or that I may be in love with him. Or that the sex is amazing. Can I say "or" anymore? It's been established that I like fucking and it doesn't matter that the booty is phenomenal. Or that I'm in love with the ex. Or that even though I said, "Sex isn't love," my brain still thinks it is ... This is probably the wrong place to be posting this.